People usually ease into their first tattoo. A smaller piece hidden on the side of the ribs, tucked behind an ear, in the crook of an arm. It can be nerve wracking. You don’t know what to expect — the pain, the artist, the permanence of it.

A lot of times — even for people who’ve always known they’ll want a tattoo, eventually — the first tattoo happens as a spur of the moment thing.

So often, people end up regretting it when they finally realize their vision for the tattoos. They end up opting for removal, a coverup, or just fitting it into a larger design.

Not my Reena.

She’d been asking me to tattoo her for a long time now, waiting on me for that initiation process. I just didn’t think she’d want to go with such a large piece for her first session.

I shouldn’t have been surprised. She reminded me — she is my daughter. All in. She’s had this artform running through her veins before it was even inked on her skin.

The Power of Ink: Telling Our Family’s Story

Even though we’d been planning this for a while, the planning just about stopped at setting a date.

Between my roles as an entrepreneur, artist, husband, father, and mentor, there’s not a whole lot of extra time to prepare for the details of a tattoo like this — my oldest daughter’s first tattoo.

We ended up preparing the design the same day. She’d been wanting this to happen for so long, but the timing just hadn’t been right. It was something we had to collaborate on together, and life just kept getting in the way.

On the day of, we didn’t rush it, really, but there was this pressure. But I’m not afraid of that pressure. I embrace it. It brings out the best in me as a designer and an artist.

It makes things real. Makes things click. I knew I would do whatever it took not to have to postpone it — to give my baby girl the 21st birthday present she deserved.

The creative juices started flowing instantly once I put myself in that headspace. It was like instinct, intuition. My hands, my body already know what to do when it comes to creating art. It’s second nature to me.

I know my daughter, her goals, her values. She ended up trusting so much of the process to me. I knew I had to make her proud.

It’s such an honor. To have been the one to mentor my daughter as she grew as an artist — an artist wise beyond her 21 years. To be the one to guide her on that right of passage as an artist with the first piece of her own. And to have the piece be so meaningful to our culture, to her ancestors, to a heritage that was almost lost in the war.

It feels almost unreal.

She asked for a Cambodian theme on one leg (to honor my side of the family), and is thinking a Filipino theme on the other (for her mother’s side). Symbolizing the connection to both cultures, a testament to the endurance of our heritage, to the love and respect she carries for the people who have come before her.

We started with the Cambodian side. There’s so much art when it comes to our culture, so many sculptures and statues to choose from, visual representations of who we are.

We chose a specific Apsara statue as a focal point. I’ve heard stories of this statue from our homeland, one of the last remaining sculptures. So many have been ruined throughout history, while the one from this story stayed in-tact. It always stood out to me.

It symbolizes more than just a connection to our culture. It shows a relentless strength of spirit.

This piece has always meant a lot to me, too. I actually wanted to get it tattooed on my own arm. Reena reassured me that I could have it, keep it for myself.

But I wanted to give this to her. As a father, I always want to share what means the most to me with my children. I can always get it tattooed on myself later — just another thing to tie us together.

I changed the design and made it my own, something I could pass along to my daughter. Something made special for her.

Reena’s Next Chapter

When I tattoo people, there’s this feeling. This energy, this vibe. It’s not just creating the artwork, it’s kind of like giving a piece of my power to them. As the artist, you guide them through it — it’s encouragement beyond words.

I was so excited to finally be able to share that with Reena, with her family there with us to stand beside her throughout the whole thing.

She’s brave, to commit to such an intensive piece (and in such a sensitive area) for her first tattoo. I am so grateful to be able to help share my strength with her through the worst of it.

After over three decades of tattooing, you’d think I’d be fully prepared to do the same for my daughter. And I was. But when it’s your own flesh and blood, the same little girl you taught to walk, bandaged scraped knees and read bedtime stories, it’s a little bit harder.

I never want to see my children in pain. I’ve tried to shield them from so much, so to be the one actually delivering it — even when it’s something they’ve been begging you for — can be a challenge.

Finding that balance between not wanting to hurt her, that urge as a father to protect her, and wanting to give her this gift, was tricky. I found myself almost being too gentle.

But once I found that balance, it was so special.

We got a good portion of it done. There’s a lot for Reena to be proud of — about eight hours actually under the needle and plenty of hours spent before that waiting as I worked on the actual design. The top section is complete, I defined outlines and bloodlines, shading and packing, and laid out the foundation for the remainder of the piece on her left leg.

But there’s still work left to do — something I’m looking forward to.

As an artist, having that experience getting tattooed helps you connect with your clients. Once you’ve had that feeling yourself, gone through the healing process, you’re able to better explain how to take care of it. You’re able to understand them more fully.

It makes the bond between client and artist that much deeper.

I feel so blessed to be able to share in those career-defining moments with my daughter. To think about how this will only improve her already incredible talent as an artist, to know she’s paving a path for her sister Reesa to follow. I can’t wait to see where she goes, where this journey takes her.

Like Reena, I’ve had so many people ask me why she hasn’t gotten tattooed before. There’s this stigma, this expectation as an artist that you’d have plenty of your own before working on others’.

But I think, especially with how talented Reena is, people forget that she’s still so young. She’s barely finished growing. She’s just now old enough to drink alcohol.

And beyond that, she’s still my baby girl. I wanted to make sure she was ready — mentally and physically. And maybe, underneath it all, I wanted to hang onto a little piece of her younger self, for just a little while longer.

But she did it. This is just the first session of many — her official welcome to the club.

She had to go back to New York right after our first session; she’s a resident artist of her own in SoHo. But in August, we’ll get to work on it more after our upcoming anesthesia collab in Beverly Hills, California.

As a father, I’m so excited for what comes next, to help define her story as an artist, and so proud of where she’s come already. As an emerging artist in the scene, I know this is just the beginning of her legacy.

Good job, baby girl. You’ve got this. Let’s gooooooo!

Read more about this in our upcoming father/daughter feature in Tattoo Society Magazine’s upcoming feature & her future, completed tattoos in upcoming blogs.